Hemingway is a master. No question. But the posthumous A Moveable Feast, edited by two of his wives, is a Hemingway travesty, and should not have been published.
I needed a Hemingway quote describing his life in Paris for something I’m writing. This, from A Moveable Feast, fit quite well:
Going down the stairs when I had worked well, and that
needed luck as well as discipline, was a wonderful feeling and
I was free to walk anywhere in Paris.
Finished with what I was writing, I took a closer look at that sentence, which sat in its own little MS Word window. What the f---?
What was it that “needed luck as well as discipline?” Going down the stairs? Was Hemingway one of those writers who had to get plastered to write? I hadn’t thought so.
Yes, yes, I know – it was the working well that needed luck as well as discipline, but grammatically and syntactically, the meaning is ambiguous.
“Going down the stairs when I had worked well was a wonderful feeling.” Now that is very nice. It resonates with one’s own experience. You don’t even have to be a la-de-da writer to know the wonderful feeling of going down stairs after working well. It certainly doesn’t need to be propped up with a self-administered pat on the back (needed discipline), made even more embarrassing by the clumsy attempt to make it sound a bit less pompous (needed luck as well).
That dumb sentence may well have made it into Hemingway’s notebook, but he would never have allowed it to be published.
Just in case anyone is wondering, here is how it appears in the story I’m writing. (Please note: my tacked-on sentence is not meant as pastiche, but parody.)
Going down the stairs when I had worked well, and that
needed luck as well as discipline, was a wonderful feeling
and I was free to walk anywhere in Paris. If I caught sight
of that nincompoop, Raymond Duncan, I would duck into
the nearest bistro for a pastis and watch my drink turn white
and then drink it, while he swanned by in his toga.
I needed a Hemingway quote describing his life in Paris for something I’m writing. This, from A Moveable Feast, fit quite well:
Going down the stairs when I had worked well, and that
needed luck as well as discipline, was a wonderful feeling and
I was free to walk anywhere in Paris.
Finished with what I was writing, I took a closer look at that sentence, which sat in its own little MS Word window. What the f---?
What was it that “needed luck as well as discipline?” Going down the stairs? Was Hemingway one of those writers who had to get plastered to write? I hadn’t thought so.
Yes, yes, I know – it was the working well that needed luck as well as discipline, but grammatically and syntactically, the meaning is ambiguous.
“Going down the stairs when I had worked well was a wonderful feeling.” Now that is very nice. It resonates with one’s own experience. You don’t even have to be a la-de-da writer to know the wonderful feeling of going down stairs after working well. It certainly doesn’t need to be propped up with a self-administered pat on the back (needed discipline), made even more embarrassing by the clumsy attempt to make it sound a bit less pompous (needed luck as well).
That dumb sentence may well have made it into Hemingway’s notebook, but he would never have allowed it to be published.
Just in case anyone is wondering, here is how it appears in the story I’m writing. (Please note: my tacked-on sentence is not meant as pastiche, but parody.)
Going down the stairs when I had worked well, and that
needed luck as well as discipline, was a wonderful feeling
and I was free to walk anywhere in Paris. If I caught sight
of that nincompoop, Raymond Duncan, I would duck into
the nearest bistro for a pastis and watch my drink turn white
and then drink it, while he swanned by in his toga.
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